He Knows My Story

I love Hebrews 11. I used to read it and marvel at how these great people of God could do the things they did, by faith. My favorite example though, is in verse 8:

"By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to the place which he would receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going."

Crazy, right? I would read that and wonder, HOW could he do that? How could he go, not knowing where he was going? It floored me that he had such an assurance and confidence in God, that he would just go, because he was told to go, and didn't even know where he would end up. That place of not knowing and yet trusting, not having the answer and yet acting, amazed me. I just couldn't quite grasp it.

Until one day, years ago, God told me to 'go' without telling me how to get there and I came to know the destination that Abraham arrived at. The surreal land of the unknown, full of unseen riches that I could feel and taste and yet not - quite - see. I was surprised that I found such a deep joy in submission and obedience. Those words sound like a chore, but acting them out was life giving to me.

The last three major moves our family has made grew out of this obedience. He would speak to me in quiet moments and prepare my heart for the future He had for us. He would show me the time period and the outcome but leave all the in between monumental makings of the destination unclear. He would tell me to wait and not speak about it to my husband until He released me to do so, sometimes weeks or even months later. And I would find we were on the same page because God had been speaking to him too.

And every time, every time, He provided. Every time, He opened the doors for us at exactly the right moment. Every time, He reassured us of His purpose in our lives. Every time, He made the way clear and unfolded His plan in such a supernatural chain of events that it was clearly His doing and not our own. And we would sit back, smile, and watch the perfection of His promises being fulfilled. Every time.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately because my lease is coming to an end in 46 days. It's time for the kids to have their own rooms. It's past time for me to have a washer and dryer connection. It's time for our next place. So I have been planning our move, gearing up to start packing, preparing my schedule and making time to make it happen. And yet I don't know yet where I'm moving. I'm not sure where my kids will be starting school in just 13 days, or if I'll even have an address by then to register them under. 

I have a lot of questions and very few answers. But I know God has a place for us. I know He has all the little details that are keeping me from sleeping worked out. In those moments that I don't have Donnie to turn to and make decisions with, I am burrowing my head in God's shoulder. And I'm assured by Him of His love for me. He keeps telling me "I've got this". He says to me "I know". I am confident in my submission and obedience to Him. 

And just like this move, this unknown home where we'll be unpacking our things in a little over a month, I know He has a plan for me, too. A hope and a future. Even if I don't know anymore, just what that will be. I know He knows. He knows my desires and He knows my heart. He knows my secrets and He knows my story. Every page. The start, the middle, the road ahead, the pit stops, the bumps, the triumphs, the bruises, the sorrows and the joys. Past. Present. Future. He knows.

And He knows your story too.